As expected, today is here. Not quite as expected, I didn’t count down and wait, watching the calendar and the clock until lunch time rolled around on the Tuesday of Short Course.
Let me back up. Last year, August 7th, our world was rocked. I wrote a post for Jamie Ivey’s Dreaming Big Dreams about it a couple of weeks ago, it was scheduled to post this Monday. It seemed like perfect timing. A few days after I wrote the post, I was up tossing and turning through the night feeling anxious about August. About August 7th specifically, but also about significant dates (and days due to the nature of our Short Course schedule each year) that surrounded it. Remembering the tough season that followed and the tears and time it took to work through what God was doing in my heart. I remember grabbing my phone and downloading Oceans, setting it to repeat, and writing. There was a stirring in my heart that I needed to process. I wrote to Him. I processed. I sang. I probably cried.
From my prayers that night:
Saturday can’t happen again. Tuesday can’t happen again. Thursday can’t happen again. The final Saturday can’t happen again. The song–the promise–the Wednesday in between can happen again. You bring life and light. You bring peace and joy. I pray You would cast out my anxiety and help me to focus on love and light this week… Use this week to remind me of Your promises. I pray I can rest in You…
And you know what? He did. As I read the post for Jamie Ivey Monday, I prayed prayers of gratitude that he had taken those anxious feelings from me. Even for the inkling yesterday when I felt a little tense about packing up and leaving College Station, I was able to remind myself He has already taken it. I was able to look at the photo of Baby Gray from that Tuesday last year and remind myself of love and light. When I remember that photo of Baby Gray, I always remember the photos from our back porch later that afternoon as well. They were bright on a dark day.
They remind me of the beauty in God’s promises. The unending love He has for us.